“Refusing to ask for help when you need it is refusing someone the chance to be helpful.” Ric Ocasek
We know the answer intellectually, but what do we usually do?
She was planning a big family dinner. She created the menu and shopping list, went grocery shopping, put everything away, only to then drag it all back out the next day and spend most of the day cooking her heart out for her family.
Her husband was “putzing” in the garage for a while, and then later in the afternoon, she found him dozing off in front of the TV.
She was feeling stressed because she very much wanted the family dinner to be special, and she was running herself ragged in order to make it happen.
He was feeling relaxed because he was looking forward to visiting with family late into the evening, and was resting so he could do that.
Now anyone can look at that situation and think, “She’s doing all the work.”
And she is.
When they planned this event, they never sat down and engaged in proper communication about who would do what in order to create a beautiful evening.
So when the day came, she’s thinking, “There’s a lot to do and surely he will help me.” However, he’s thinking, “I’m going to stay out of her way so I don’t make things even more difficult for her. She usually takes the lead on these things and she’s much better at it than I am.”
Neither of them are wrong.
And their hearts are in the right place.
But because they’re not communicating, she’s getting more resentful by the hour.
So many frustrations in marriage arise because we don’t communicate well.
If communication is a downfall inside your marriage and it’s causing some heartache, let’s explore if there’s a fit for you and I to work together.
You can schedule a complimentary Truth & Clarity session here.