“Loving everything about yourself – even the “unacceptable” – is an act of personal power. It is the beginning of healing.” Christiane Northrup
Let’s talk about power. More specifically, let’s talk about the desire to feel powerful in our lives and in our relationships.
I’m not talking about the kind of toxic power where we are looking to exploit or exert our influence over someone else, and certainly not someone we claim to love.
I’m talking about personal power.
Having personal power is when you know that you get to decide how to think and feel about any circumstance in your life.
Having personal power is when you have emotional mastery so that you can create the results you want.
→ You know how to set healthy boundaries.
→ You know how to have your own back.
→ You know how to honor yourself.
→ You are in control of your own choices.
→ You apologize when it’s warranted.
There is no path that will lead us to a place of feeling powerful in our life that doesn’t go through the land of personal responsibility. Even when (especially when!) things aren’t going as we would prefer.
This is especially true inside of our relationships. It’s easy to point blame at our partner, but we have to ask ourselves what role we played in it.
Did we overlook, allow or accommodate some bad behavior?
Did we pretend things were fine, when we knew the relationship dynamics were far from fine?
Did we avoid talking about the difficult things with our partner because it was easier not to?
I’m not saying that taking personal responsibility for your lives is easy, but it is simple. And nothing will change your life, and your most intimate relationship, quicker than owning your personal power and taking personal responsibility.
If you want to feel more powerful in your life and marriage, I’d love to help.
P.S. No one wants to feel disempowered in their own lives. When we feel like everything is happening TO us, it leaves us as the victim in the story. And that will always feel horrible. Let’s not do that anymore.