My Biggest Beef with the Self-Help Industry

Last updated: Jul 22, 2020

“I dislike the work self-help. Self-awareness, yes, but not self-help.” Deepak Chopra


Okay…..I know…..I know……Clearly, as a Love Coach I exist and live within the self-help industry. I’ve written seven self-help books and blog every few days about how to create loving relationships that feel good to your soul (and how to change or release the ones that don’t).

But here’s where I disagree with what’s happening in the field of self-help:

You are Not Broken.

I know it benefits us as coaches, healers, therapists, etc…to convince you that you are broken and that the only way to put yourself back together is to hire one of us to be the glue. The problem with that approach, however is that it leaves you feeling disempowered and helpless. And it’s near impossible to make progress when you’re feeling disempowered and helpless.

My approach to coaching is that, if I don’t see you completely in your power, having happy, healthy and connected relationships, then how can you realistically believe in yourself to get there?

I will hold that light of the version of you who I see and just keep calling you towards that light…

Equipping you with tools so you can improve your most important relationships (including the one with yourself)….

Clearing away the clutter and showing you what’s real and what’s true so that the fears and doubt no longer keep you in painful relationships and loneliness…

Can you benefit from hiring a coach that has walked through the exact same fire you’re standing in now and is equipped to guide you through it? Absolutely…when I invested in a business coach, I hired someone who had been there and done that, building a successful business on their own. We all need help once in a while and if you’ve been attempting to escape the pain or get the clarity you need on your own and not getting the results you want….perhaps it’s time to look to someone who’s been there, done that.

Will you get the results you want much quicker with a coach? No doubt…we will do in weeks what it takes other approaches years to do.

Do you need a coach forever? Hell, no. If I don’t equip you with the insights and tools you need so that you can walk this life and create the relationships you want on your own, then I’m not doing my job. The alternative is that you look to me – or anyone else – to tell you what to do for the rest of your life (Not a good idea…).

But, hear me when I tell you: You are NOT broken. You may have forgotten who you are, you may have gotten a little lost, you may have made some choices that you now question – we’ve all done that before, but none of that makes you broken. And I refuse to see you that way. Because if I jump in the pit with you, I cannot help you out.

Here’s your ladder.




If You’re Struggling In Your Marriage…

I will help you find the clarity you need to re-commit to making your marriage work
or the strength and peace of mind to lovingly release it.