“With all things in life, we do not get what we ask for, we get what we expect.” Iyanla Vanzant Claire had endured some hurt and betrayals from her husband recently. He had treated her...
We Meet People at the Level of Our Expectation
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Inspiration
Relationship Expert Weighs-In: Three Practices That Will Make Harry & Meghan’s Marriage Last (and What We Can All Learn from Them)
I, like so many, consumed the Harry & Meghan documentary series last night. I didn’t walk into the Netflix series with any pre-disposed ideas or opinions, I just thought it would be interesting...
I’m So Glad that I Did Not Leave
“Let yourself be open and life will be easier.” Buddha Siddhartha Recently, someone asked me, “Can two people who have been disconnected for YEARS ever find their way back to one another?” The...
A Mic Drop Marriage Moment
“Difficult roads lead to beautiful destinations.” Zig Ziglar I have been working with R. for some time and she and her husband’s relationship have gone through plenty of high and low points. But...
One Reason for Some Affairs: Disconnection from Self
“It’s one thing to lose people you love. It is another to lose yourself. That is a greater loss.” Donna Goddard My client, who I’ll refer to as Sue, had been enduring more than her fair share of...
Surviving Valentine’s Day when Your Marriage is Struggling
I know what you’re thinking…Valentine’s Day when your marriage is struggling rolls will look like some version of: Buying an obligatory card for your spouse, without feeling like anything written on...
I Have to Share This Lesson in Perspective with You
I heard an incredible story on perspective from a woman named Sharla Brown this past weekend (more about her in a moment). Sharla was in India and through a translator, she was speaking with a woman...
Begin Again
Maybe this year wasn’t what you had expected and didn’t exactly go as planned. Begin again. Maybe this past year brought you more heartbreak and pain that you thought was possible. Begin again....
We Have High Expectations for Our Marriages
“Expectations were like fine pottery. The harder you held them, the more likely they were to crack.” Brandon Sanderson Marriage began as a means to increase wealth and power for a family. Men...
His Wife Is Changing…and He Doesn’t Like It
“Women marry men hoping that the man will change. Men marry women hoping the woman will not change. Inevitably, they both end up disappointed.” Albert Einstein My client, who I’ll refer to as Rachel...
My Musings on Marriage
“Most of us are imprisoned by something. We’re living in darkness until something flips on the switch.” Wynonna Judd I love the idea of having someone to walk beside in this life. I love that...
Why We Avoid Setting Boundaries
“When you know you are of worth, you don’t have to raise your voice, you don’t have to become rude, you don’t have to become vulgar; you just are. And you are like the sky is, as the air is, the...
Sharing Some Gifts with You
“Love is not about property, diamonds and gifts. It is about sharing your very self with the world around you.” Pablo Neruda At this time of year, we’re thinking a lot about presents. Let’s also...
The Danger of Our Expectations. A Very Personal Story.
“Expectations will steal the gifts that are sitting right there in front of you.” Jada Pinkett Smith This deeply personal story could help every relationship you have… I am witnessing my...
Judgement Doesn’t Help
“If you judge people, you have no time to love them.” Mother Theresa Women who have lied find me… Women who have cheated find me… Women who have engaged with married men find me… Women who...
Challenging the Inevitable Truth
“The truth is rarely pure and never simple.” Oscar Wilde Virtually everyone believes their thoughts as Truth (with a capital T). No one walks around thinking, “I think I’ll believe that lie.”...
How are You Showing Up as a Woman?
“One is not born a woman, one becomes one.” Simone De Beauvoir My client, who I’ll refer to as Tammy, is getting ready to have that incredibly difficult conversation with her husband. She’s been...
This is What to Do with Drama and Struggle
“It’s not somebody’s fault if their father was an abusive alcoholic, but it’s for damn sure their responsibility to figure out how they’re gonna deal with those traumas and try to make a life out of...
When We Withhold Love
“If you withhold love as a form of punishment, who is being punished?” Donald L. Hicks Here’s how most relationships work: When my spouse is doing the things that I want them to do, I show...
Why I Love It When My Coaching Clients Stop Working with Me
“You wanna fly, you got to give up the shit that weights you down.” Toni Morrison, Song of Solomon Last week one of my coaching clients stopped working with me. When she came to me she had...
Are You Listening? Are You Listening to Yourself?
“Never apologize for trusting your intuition – your brain can play tricks, your heart can blind, but your gut is always right.” Rachel Wolchin My client, Sue, had a long talk with her husband. He...
What has been Your Biggest Mistake?
“Sometimes our biggest mistake gives us our greatest reward.” Namita Budhiraja I received an application today that read something like… Our relationship has been one roller coaster ride...
You Have Every Right to Complain…It Just Won’t Serve You
“Complaining not only ruins everybody else’s day, it ruins the complainer’s day too. The more we complain, the more unhappy we get.” Dennis Prager Yesterday morning I woke up at 5:55 am and...
Choosing Peace is a Gift to Yourself
“Inner peace begins the moment you choose to not allow another person or event to control your emotions.” Pema Chödrön Here’s something you may not know about me: I am horrible at arguing. I...
To Love takes Courage
“Love was a leap into the unknown, not a cautious dipping of the toe.” Martina Boone The word courage has a Latin root, cor, which means heart. The heart has long been a metaphor used to depict...
We Do What We Want to Do. Period.
“Adults get to behave however they want.” Brooke Castillo My client, Maggie, has begged her husband, Joe, for years to spend more time with her. The kids are grown and off on their own now and...
My First 100 Clients…and the Ripple Effect.
“….ultimately all you can do is fix yourself. And that’s a lot. Because if you can fix yourself, it has a ripple effect.” Rob Reiner I realized something last night: I’ve now worked with...
If I Stay Right Here, Nothing Bad Will Happen
“Inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage.” Dale Carnegie Inspiration can come from many different places. This one came from my own experience in New York this...
I Wish He Would
“What changes your world is not wishing for change; what changes your world is changing.” Jim Rohn I used to be that person that would see people in the potential of who they could be, rather than...
How Is This Possible In Coaching?
“What is now proved, was only once imagined.” William Blake I’m in a coaching session with my new client Eve. She tells me about how she used to be so brave in her life, traveling to...
You’ve Changed…
“You’re always in the process of becoming. You aren’t who you were and you aren’t who you are going to be.” Rob Bell Maybe some of this sounds familiar: "You've changed. Now you're too...(fill-in...
10 Quotes for Understanding Why Some Marriages Struggle
Compare and Despair
“The Reason We Struggle with Insecurity is because We Compare Our behind the Scenes with Everyone Else’s Highlight Reel.” Steven Furtick We live in an interesting time of sharing snippets of...
My Life Needed to be Blown-Up
“When your life shatters, you’re being awakened.” Martha Beck Ten years ago, I was submerged in a life and a career that I thought contained all the keys to happiness, but instead was a life...
How Life Coaches are Like Personal Trainers.
“It is not only what we do, but also what we do not do, for which we are accountable.” John Baptiste Molière There’s a very clear reason why people hire personal trainers. It’s not because...
The Most Important Thing a Man Wants
“(on love) It’s the only thing that allows men and women to stand in a world where gravity always seems to want to pull them down…bring them low…and make them crawl.” Stephen King I was asked to...
My Biggest Beef with the Self-Help Industry
“I dislike the work self-help. Self-awareness, yes, but not self-help.” Deepak Chopra Okay…..I know…..I know……Clearly, as a Love Coach I exist and live within the self-help industry. I’ve...
Looking for Love in All the Wrong Places
“You’ve been criticizing yourself for years and it hasn’t worked. Try approving of yourself and see what happens.” Louise L. Hay My client Jennifer seems to be getting judgements and...
A Little Distraction Goes a Long Way
“Don't wish me happiness I don't expect to be happy all the time... It's gotton beyond that somehow. Wish me courage and strength and a sense of humor. I will need them all.” Anne Morrow Lindbergh...
I’m so Selfish
“Selfishness is not living as one wishes to live, it is asking others to live as one wishes to live.” Oscar Wilde You know when you go to the hair salon and it’s like sitting on a therapist’s...
Have Someone in Your Family that’s Hard to Love? Try This.
“What you focus on expands.” T. Harv Eker We all have that special someone in our families that's hard to love… That one person that you know you’re going need to face this holiday… That...
What I’m Learning from Coaching Men
“When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves.” Viktor E Frankl From the beginning, I always knew I would work with women – particularly women of a...
Soften Up, Baby
“Love is never lost. If not reciprocated, it will flow back and soften and purify the heart.” Washington Irving During my first marriage, I wasn’t a Master Life Coach. I was in corporate...
The Good in Goodbye
“Thank God I found the good in goodbye.” Beyoncé Knowles My client, Karen got out of a marriage that lasted almost three decades and although she would admit that she wasn’t happy in the...
Life Outside Your Safe Zone
“Everything you want is on the other side of fear.” Jack Canfield When people approach me as a coach and trust me enough to share with me their story, there are some common threads in those...
Seeing through the Eyes of Love
“Every loving thought is true. Everything else is an appeal for healing and help, regardless of the form it takes.” A Course in Miracles I have a client in Europe that I’ve been working with...
Being Intentional about the Energy You Allow
“Please take responsibility for the energy you bring into this space.” Dr. Jill Bolte Taylor One of my clients is building an amazing new coaching practice for adolescents and young adults trying to...
Why I’m Not a Fan of Affirmations
“…before a wound can heal, it must be seen.” Julia Cameron It’s not that I think affirmations are a bad thing; I don’t. The mind can be incredibly powerful. But too often, we try to use...
What’s Whispering to You Right Now?
“Let your heart guide you. It whispers…so listen closely.” The Land before Time I believe that our souls are always speaking to us, whispering to us. And our souls love nothing more than to...
Love is My Religion
“In every religion there is love, yet love has no religion.” Mesut Barazany I’m sitting in the waiting room of my doctor’s office completing the paperwork they need me to fill-out before seeing the...